Navigate the challenges of a contested divorce with the support of Alatsas Law Firm, conveniently located for clients in Brooklyn, Queens, and Staten Island. Our experienced divorce attorneys advocate for your rights in asset division, child custody, and spousal support. We provide empathetic and responsive legal representation to help you achieve a fair resolution. Contact us to discuss your contested divorce case or call (718) 233-2903.

 

 

 

child custody and co-parentingRegardless of how long you've been married, divorce is rarely easy. The process of going through a divorce takes its toll on even the most reasonable and cooperative couples, and this process becomes even more complex if there are children involved. The emotional, mental, and financial strain can feel overwhelming at times, especially when trying to maintain stability for the children. However, research consistently shows that most children benefit from having both parents in their lives even after those parents' marriages have ended. Studies indicate that children of divorce who maintain healthy relationships with both parents tend to have better emotional adjustment, academic performance, and social development compared to those who lose contact with one parent.

If you are going through a divorce or considering filing for one, here are 10 co-parenting tips to keep in mind as you plan for a child's future. These strategies can help minimize the negative impact of divorce on your children while fostering a healthy co-parenting relationship.

1. Be as Rational as Possible

Emotions run high in divorce situations, but do your best to keep your tone professional and be rational while dealing with your ex-spouse. It may help to blow off steam with a trusted friend or talk to a therapist about your feelings if you are having trouble keeping your emotions in check for the sake of your kids. Remember that maintaining composure during interactions with your ex-spouse sets a positive example for your children about handling difficult situations with maturity and respect.

2. Keep Communication Open

Talking to your ex may be the last thing you feel like doing, but it is necessary and important if you are co-parenting one or more children. Stay in touch with your ex rather than ignoring each other or blowing off each other's calls. Consider using co-parenting apps or establishing regular check-ins to ensure important information about your children is shared effectively and consistently.

3. Focus on the Child's Well-being

With every decision you make, ask yourself if this is what is in the best interests of your child. Children should be at the center of your divorce-related decisions but not stuck in the middle of your conflicts. Remember that your children's emotional health and stability should always take precedence over any personal grievances you may have with your ex-spouse.

4. Be Somewhat Flexible

While you should not give up what's important to you or what you know is right in a child custody dispute, accept the fact that you will need to be somewhat flexible and perhaps compromise on certain issues. Understanding that life circumstances change and being willing to adjust schedules or arrangements when necessary can help create a more harmonious co-parenting relationship.

5. Establish New Routines

When spending time with your children after a divorce, do your best to keep things low-key and establish new routines. This can be as simple as having dinner together, enjoying board game nights, or choosing new TV shows to watch together. Creating predictable patterns helps children feel secure and gives them something positive to look forward to during their time with each parent.

6. Be Honest with Your Kids

While your children don't need to know every gritty detail about why you and your ex-spouse split up, it's important to be honest about what's happening in the family when you discuss your divorce. Use age-appropriate language and focus on reassuring them that both parents still love them unconditionally.

7. Listen to Children's Concerns

You may never know how your children are feeling about your divorce until you ask. Encourage your kids to ask questions about how this life-changing event will affect their daily routines and truly listen to their worries and concerns. Create a safe space for them to express their emotions without fear of judgment or criticism.

8. Give Your Child Some Space

In the beginning, your children may need a little time and space to process all the changes going on in your family. Don't force your kids to talk before they're ready and accept that they may need a little extra space to work things out for themselves before opening up. Be patient and available when they are ready to share their thoughts and feelings.

9. Reassess Logistics and Scheduling

Relationship dynamics and scheduling arrangements are inherently fluid, which underscores the importance of maintaining flexibility in your co-parenting approach. It's crucial to regularly evaluate and adjust your co-parenting schedules and transportation logistics to ensure they continue to serve your children's best interests. As your children grow and their needs evolve, what worked initially may need modification. Consider factors like school activities, extracurricular commitments, and social developments when reassessing these arrangements. Regular schedule reviews can help prevent potential conflicts and ensure smooth transitions between households.

10. Have a Great Attorney on Your Side

When cooperative co-parenting strategies face challenges, having a knowledgeable and empathetic child custody attorney becomes invaluable. At Alatsas Law Firm, we specialize in helping parents navigate the intricate landscape of custody arrangements, including physical, legal, joint, and sole custody options. Our experienced team is committed to ensuring that your legal decisions align with your children's best interests, providing guidance through every step of the process. We understand the delicate nature of custody matters and work diligently to achieve outcomes that benefit both parents and children.

For a comprehensive discussion about your divorce or child custody concerns, reach out to us for a free legal consultation. Contact us online or call 718-233-2903 to schedule your appointment.

Ted Alatsas
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Trusted Brooklyn, New York Family Law Attorney helping NY residents with Elder Law and Asset Protection